Are you an independent girl living in the city, earning and trying to make it big? Or just trying to live in the city? What really defines an independent girl? The power to make your own decisions? The freedom to eat anywhere and do anything? Or the sheer joy of being able to shop without long discussions and arguments with your parents?
Monetary freedom means that now I can buy whatever I want and from wherever I want. But limited monetary freedom means that “wherever” is restricted to discounts, online websites, coupons and freebies. Not that I am complaining. With a whole wide array of items available everywhere and amazing websites with discount coupons I can manage to upgrade my shopping list to a level 2 of the shoppers’ arena with Steve Maddens, NYX and Fendi on discount, level 1 being LV, GUCCI, Prada et all.
And this is where a man comes in and messes up the whole game. He wants to shop for you and the shopper in you, the girl who loves labels she can’t afford feels ecstatic and on cloud nine until the cloud rudely bursts. Should you kick your self-respect and the whole independent theme in the butt and let him buy expensive items for you or should you take the high road and politely refuse?
Arguments galore, the man in question and well, many men, try to talk “sense” into you by claiming that this is the way they can show their “affection” for you plus you are his “girl” so they want to shop for you. But then again, are you a commodity? And when you try and apply the same logic to men, he is your “guy” and you should shop for him. Why doesn’t this work? Why does feminism take a back seat in this conversation?
Looking around one can see so many girls sporting Louboutins and Louis Vuittons that you wonder where exactly are they working and how do I get a job there? When you see their better halves trudging behind them straddling bags of more louboutins. Can a girl have enough shoes?
Personally, I am embattled with this, my writing pays me to go splurge on me and then Mr. I-will-shop-for-you decides to buy me something I might like. Well, he decides and the actual buying rarely happens (if he is determined and consumed in a passion for me and an even higher passion for showing his potency as a money minting alpha male). What happened to alpha females I may ask?
So over a large bottle of water and a determined eye, I go around scrounging a store (usually The Body Shop or Steve Madden) to find my bit of heaven and he may surprise me occasionally with a gift card or a nice watch from a nice store (Swarovski?) But then again, he does earn more than me (right now) and once I hit it off as a filmmaker then it will be me buying expensive Rolex watches and luxury Yacht cruises. When it comes to men, it really is difficult to buy him a gift.
Or maybe he likes to buy me an occasional something because it is a nice gesture and I do the same (or I try too).